First, there was this time The Farmer traded me for magic beans......

So, I had nerve block #3 yesterday.
It hurt. And they didnt work... Six weeks of this crap & they didnt work!
Bah! What else can I say?

Wait, I always have something to say....you know what I dont get though? I mean, I know its normal for the Anesthesiologists office to do 1.2 million of these procedures a day, but for ME, I'd like a little bit of privacy. When your ass is hanging out and I mean HANGING out, do office staff HAVE to walk in, when you have your pants down?

Allow me to back up, so you get a clearer picture...
They have you get up on the tall table.
This table is meant for people that are 7 foot tall.

Since Im only 5'8", I have to use a stool.
Then, they have you lay on your stomach, atop two pillows. The nurse pulls yer knickers down, so your whole ass is hanging out. Literally.

I lost all decency & dignity upon giving birth last, so its not the fact that my ass is hanging out. Its the fact, that they do SOO many of these a day, they become the "norm"....so while the nurse is scrubbing me down with the brown goo...office staff casually walk in, and start stocking materials.

Hello? Im laying here with my ass hanging out, and they are STOCKING the room. No one knocks, they just enter. Im offended at this point, while 3 office staff are talking over my bare ass, trying to decide what they are ordering for lunch.

Seriously people?

Seriously.

So, that all leads me back to the Ass in Shrek...Donkey.

When he says: "Oh man where do I begin? First, there was this time the farmer traded me for some magic beans. I aint ever gotten over that.

Then this fool went off and had a party, and they all started trying to pin a tail on me. Then they all got drunk and started hitting me, yelling, Pinata! Pinata! "

Anyone ever feel like the Donkey on Shrek?
I know I did, lol.....

Rainbows inspire hope.....right?

They say rainbows inspire hope. That somewhere over the rainbow is a pot of gold.

Well, I make lots of rainbows & I've yet to find a pot of gold OR a little irish man....pfftt...

So tomorrow it happens again. Yes, that.


(Transforaminal Nerve Blocks) I get to lay belly down on the hospital table, with my pants pulled down right below my butt crack and wait on the doctor. Yes, like that.

When I mentioned it, he told me that he could identify people by their backsides, better than their faces.....

WOW...he did NOT just go there. Oh yes he did...lol.

-I hate the whole sedated-drooling-on-my-couch-look.

-I hate the whole needle into the spine gig. I really hate that.

-I hate how it feels like my spine is on fire.

-I like how cool the ultrasound gelly is....& I like the turquoisey-minty blue color it comes in. Think if I take the bottle, they'll notice?

-I also like the blue color dye they inject into my spine...its pretty.

Are you all sensing some blue beads coming up? Oh, you know me too well, dont you? And yes, BLUE is my favorite color...

-oh, oh, and I hate when the anesthetic wears off and my ass starts to hurt....ALL weekend.

- I hate the fact that I'll lose about 2-3 days after the procedure.

- I like the fact that it gives my girls & I lots of MOVIE time....which reminds me, Couples Retreat is on the list to watch. Have any of you seen that? Seriously, Vince Vaughn makes my heart laugh.

I would marry Vince if I knew him. But I dont. He still makes me laugh.

They say laughter is good for the soul...
Hard to remember when your in alot of pain, but I know I have soo many friends that pick me up on the dreariest of days. Days like tomorrow...

Thank you to all those friends.